My passport must be somewhere. I barely leave the country...this passport is in the house somewhere. It has to be. That'll be my weekend mission, I think.
Went into the office for the first time this week, was nice to have a bit of quiet and crack on with some stuff. Quite a lot of it to do, too, which is good as it pays my bills etc.
A few more enquiries coming in about the murder mystery...another weekend plan must be to go over the script again and make sure it's totally, 100% watertight. It felt good the other day but I was in a bit of a bubble with the whole thing.
Evening off to Norwich with the band. Long evening, bit of a rush to get there. Small-ish venue but looked like a sellout to me and we put in 4 new songs. We're on great form at the moment, I'm amazed we're still a band but I'm so glad we are.
Friday, 31 March 2017
Thursday, 30 March 2017
Wednesday 29th March 2017
Can't find my bloody passport. We're not heading out till October but as the promoter is paying for our flights I need to scan my passport in and I can't find it anywhere...I haven't left the country in years so it must be in the house somewhere...
Long day in the studio with GCP. We're old school pals and played in a band together in our early-twenties. He's pushing his career really hard at the moment and his second album is doing really well for funding so it's nice that he's got me in as a session drummer to play drums for it. Did the first 4 songs today, arrangements needed a little work rhythmically as my initial plans to replicate his pre-programmed grooves didn't work (as the producer says: you're trying to replicate the drum parts written by someone who isn't a drummer) so I had to do my own thing which didn't impede on the tracks. 8 hours later and we got it done. Longer day than planned but it's the results that matter and they sound great.
Got back, did some freelancing and sent out more emails about the murder mystery. Not that I actually have any gaps in my diary anyway...
Long day in the studio with GCP. We're old school pals and played in a band together in our early-twenties. He's pushing his career really hard at the moment and his second album is doing really well for funding so it's nice that he's got me in as a session drummer to play drums for it. Did the first 4 songs today, arrangements needed a little work rhythmically as my initial plans to replicate his pre-programmed grooves didn't work (as the producer says: you're trying to replicate the drum parts written by someone who isn't a drummer) so I had to do my own thing which didn't impede on the tracks. 8 hours later and we got it done. Longer day than planned but it's the results that matter and they sound great.
Got back, did some freelancing and sent out more emails about the murder mystery. Not that I actually have any gaps in my diary anyway...
Tuesday 28th March 2017
Feeling so rough...but so does everyone else in the house/around me too so it's probably just an annoying thing that isn't worth worrying about.
Did a bit more work on the script and then, as it's a Tuesday, took Mum shopping and spent much time sat in a supermarket car park. Really productive today though; as always I have my trusty notepad with me and I finished the mapping of my new novel, 90 Seconds, which at some point (later in the year) I'll write up. It's all good.
FH pre-production session - basically a rehearsal in the studio where we record anyway but with the producer recording the session so he can make notes ahead of the proper session on Sunday. Normally this is not needed but as we've changed direction a little with album 3 he just wanted to know what we're up to...we're crossing the reggae line a bit with this but it's sounding glorious all the same.
We're all quite excited as a band as we've just confirmed a 12 day in run in China. How will I cope with the food over there?
Did a bit more work on the script and then, as it's a Tuesday, took Mum shopping and spent much time sat in a supermarket car park. Really productive today though; as always I have my trusty notepad with me and I finished the mapping of my new novel, 90 Seconds, which at some point (later in the year) I'll write up. It's all good.
FH pre-production session - basically a rehearsal in the studio where we record anyway but with the producer recording the session so he can make notes ahead of the proper session on Sunday. Normally this is not needed but as we've changed direction a little with album 3 he just wanted to know what we're up to...we're crossing the reggae line a bit with this but it's sounding glorious all the same.
We're all quite excited as a band as we've just confirmed a 12 day in run in China. How will I cope with the food over there?
Monday 27th March 2017
Plenty of 'proper' work starting to come in today, last week I had more time and it would have been awesome but I'm too excited about the murder mystery script to do 'proper' stuff today. It can wait till tomorrow.
Made lots of good progress on the murder mystery today - it's all been very first draft for a long time, so it was nice to totally nail it into something solid. Not far off at all, 8 hours of writing with a heavy cold later...
Made lots of good progress on the murder mystery today - it's all been very first draft for a long time, so it was nice to totally nail it into something solid. Not far off at all, 8 hours of writing with a heavy cold later...
Sunday, 26 March 2017
Sunday 26th March 2017
Clocks when forward an hour and it totally threw me. Met up with Emma for a quick coffee, and then over to Mum's for Mother's Day. Spent the whole day there, nearly crashed when the dog was barking in my ear and I lost concentration (something has to be done about this) but we all calmed down eventually.
So many new ideas but I need to get the final draft of the murder mystery show written as a priority...just never enough time, though, is there? Intense rehearsals start in just over a week. Next week I really need to roll my sleeves up and create some magic.
So many new ideas but I need to get the final draft of the murder mystery show written as a priority...just never enough time, though, is there? Intense rehearsals start in just over a week. Next week I really need to roll my sleeves up and create some magic.
Saturday 25th March 2017
Pretty much finished writing up my tour notes now, as far as I can see it's looking good. Will leave it for a couple of weeks now, come back and edit accordingly before releasing it in May.
That took up most of late morning/afternoon, before quickly invoicing a couple venues and then suddenly the day was gone. Basically, in the world of a freelancer, Saturday is pretty much the same as any other day.
In the evening we had the invite-only screening of the Box tour film - it works a treat and even at 61 minutes doesn't feel too long. Great evening in the great company of Marcus, Leigh, Phill, Sarah, Al (and family), Rob and Fiona. A bit like the book version, this will probably go live in May, because that's when everything else should be in shape.
That took up most of late morning/afternoon, before quickly invoicing a couple venues and then suddenly the day was gone. Basically, in the world of a freelancer, Saturday is pretty much the same as any other day.
In the evening we had the invite-only screening of the Box tour film - it works a treat and even at 61 minutes doesn't feel too long. Great evening in the great company of Marcus, Leigh, Phill, Sarah, Al (and family), Rob and Fiona. A bit like the book version, this will probably go live in May, because that's when everything else should be in shape.
Saturday, 25 March 2017
Friday 24th March 2017
Had a really good freelancing today; I've been drifting a bit with that but today I really got stuck in and actually did some good for the company, I think.
Confirmed a brilliant offer for the murder mystery show in a cracking venue (I've been talking to them for the best part of a week) and generally feel quite on top of all of the projects at the moment.
Evening gig with the band in Royston. Cracker of a gig; okay, so it does feel like off stage we're not quite the tight close group we used to be (we travelled and ate separately, for example - that would never have happened before) but onstage we're totally unstoppable. The material for album 3 is utterly superb and it feels like we're totally nailing it, we opened with a brand new track and also played 3 other new tunes tonight alongside the stuff that the audience were there for. The 'surprise' cover of The Chain (that we'd bashed out a few times in rehearsals recently) felt rushed and sloppy but on the whole...yeah, we have to keep this going. 2 standing ovations and a LOT of CD sales afterwards.
Home by 1am, which for any sort of gig is a victory.
Confirmed a brilliant offer for the murder mystery show in a cracking venue (I've been talking to them for the best part of a week) and generally feel quite on top of all of the projects at the moment.
Evening gig with the band in Royston. Cracker of a gig; okay, so it does feel like off stage we're not quite the tight close group we used to be (we travelled and ate separately, for example - that would never have happened before) but onstage we're totally unstoppable. The material for album 3 is utterly superb and it feels like we're totally nailing it, we opened with a brand new track and also played 3 other new tunes tonight alongside the stuff that the audience were there for. The 'surprise' cover of The Chain (that we'd bashed out a few times in rehearsals recently) felt rushed and sloppy but on the whole...yeah, we have to keep this going. 2 standing ovations and a LOT of CD sales afterwards.
Home by 1am, which for any sort of gig is a victory.
Friday, 24 March 2017
Thursday 23rd March 2017
Spent the morning working on the murder mystery show, and answering all the many questions from venues that come with that. It's turning into a nice little business, that one.
The afternoon was spent on the tour book; 4 days on and off writing it, just over 20,000 words so far. Not bad at all.
Met up with Emma for dinner, got annoyed by the A14, and then back to work on the tour book.
Been quite a productive week so far, which, considering I'm pretty much off the Red Bull, is a miracle.
The afternoon was spent on the tour book; 4 days on and off writing it, just over 20,000 words so far. Not bad at all.
Met up with Emma for dinner, got annoyed by the A14, and then back to work on the tour book.
Been quite a productive week so far, which, considering I'm pretty much off the Red Bull, is a miracle.
Wednesday 22nd March 2017
Went into the office to freelance, nobody was in but I don't mind - still got the work done anyway.
Also found the time to send out a bunch of emails about the murder mystery show, the team building project and trying to fill in a few gaps for the 'box' solo show (I've got 15 performances of that coming up but it doesn't feel like enough, somehow). So far, the murder mystery show is wining...simply LOADS of interest in that at the moment.
Got back, spent another couple of hours on the book and then went off to see Laura Marling with my mate Steve. Good gig, lacking in drums, but nice enough all the same.
Also found the time to send out a bunch of emails about the murder mystery show, the team building project and trying to fill in a few gaps for the 'box' solo show (I've got 15 performances of that coming up but it doesn't feel like enough, somehow). So far, the murder mystery show is wining...simply LOADS of interest in that at the moment.
Got back, spent another couple of hours on the book and then went off to see Laura Marling with my mate Steve. Good gig, lacking in drums, but nice enough all the same.
Tuesday 21st March 2017
Caught up on emails in the morning (my life is basically all emails at the moment) and then, as it's a Tuesday, took Mum shopping.
A few enquires about the team building with drums project which is cool. I've paid quite a bit to book a slot at an open day for it soon...this had better work out!
All seems happy enough with family stuff, and then over to FH rehearsal in which the new material is sounding awesome.
Got back and spent another three hours working on the tour book, which is turning out really well.
A few enquires about the team building with drums project which is cool. I've paid quite a bit to book a slot at an open day for it soon...this had better work out!
All seems happy enough with family stuff, and then over to FH rehearsal in which the new material is sounding awesome.
Got back and spent another three hours working on the tour book, which is turning out really well.
Tuesday, 21 March 2017
Monday 20th March 2017
2 enquiries for the team building with drums project have come in, albeit tentatively. I kinda need that to start working as the freelance stuff is drying up a bit, I've got a little bit for this week and some royalties coming in so enough to keep me ticking over but things will get expensive soon (house move, Edinburgh Fringe) so need to start being a grown-up and planning a few months down the line.
Spent a bit of the morning freelancing, and then getting confused by a letter from America about tax stuff. Luckily, I live with an accountant who understands all the weird terminology - in short they overtaxed me slightly for my US royalties (book sales, mostly for a play I wrote 7 years ago) and they owe me $3.26. However, to claim it back I need to write to them and it would probably cost me more than that in postage to do so. I think I'll let them keep it.
The plan this week is to finish both my tour memoirs (proper book release of this in June, but those who chipped in to the Crowdfunding will get it next month as a thank you) and the final draft of the murder mystery as the rehearsals kick in soon. So far, roughly on track.
Spent a bit of the morning freelancing, and then getting confused by a letter from America about tax stuff. Luckily, I live with an accountant who understands all the weird terminology - in short they overtaxed me slightly for my US royalties (book sales, mostly for a play I wrote 7 years ago) and they owe me $3.26. However, to claim it back I need to write to them and it would probably cost me more than that in postage to do so. I think I'll let them keep it.
The plan this week is to finish both my tour memoirs (proper book release of this in June, but those who chipped in to the Crowdfunding will get it next month as a thank you) and the final draft of the murder mystery as the rehearsals kick in soon. So far, roughly on track.
Sunday 19th March 2017
Not as hungover as I should be, but last night was so much fun. It was like we had the old gang back together again; Matt, Marcus, Rob, me - just like the old days. Gig was fun, too, despite some technical issues.
With the new management agency announcing that they've 'signed' me, I shared that link around a bit. They seem great, I've known of Michelle for a few years anyway and she'd already got me some stand-up work before we agreed that I join them. It's non-exclusive so I still have the freedom to do what I want, but they're on the lookout for decent corporate gigs for me in return for a small cut and they seem to have contacts that are slightly out of my range at the moment so everyone is a winner.
Caught up with Rob for a spot of lunch and to talk about our continued confusion with women, and then back to work on writing up my tour adventures.
With the new management agency announcing that they've 'signed' me, I shared that link around a bit. They seem great, I've known of Michelle for a few years anyway and she'd already got me some stand-up work before we agreed that I join them. It's non-exclusive so I still have the freedom to do what I want, but they're on the lookout for decent corporate gigs for me in return for a small cut and they seem to have contacts that are slightly out of my range at the moment so everyone is a winner.
Caught up with Rob for a spot of lunch and to talk about our continued confusion with women, and then back to work on writing up my tour adventures.
Sunday, 19 March 2017
Saturday 18th March 2017
Spent the morning catching up on emails; so many emails and conversations and dialogues and....well, you can just lose most of the day doing it.
As a result, though, I've confirmed a couple more shows and now have management for my comedy work. This has been in the pipeline for a few days (they've already booked me for a nice show) and is a bit of a relief to finally be 'represented'. I think things are moving in the right direction.
Then off to soundchecks, and gig, with Griff, Hannah and band ahead of the EP launch that night. Fun night, lots of good friends there. As I had a rare night off from driving I was slightly tipsy, but in a good way - it felt part gig/part party, as much as my head will be sore from this in the morning.
Saturday, 18 March 2017
Friday 17th March 2017
Our mixed bill stand-up show tonight was cancelled at horrifically short notice due to lack of interest from the locals...I don't mind so much as it's St Paddy's night and that usually attracts the wrong audience. The thing I'm annoyed, okay, angry is about is one of the comedians I booked for the show, Andy, was coming down from London so booked a room at the venue (which is also a hotel) for the night but the venue then charged him for the room anyway even though they pulled the show. The Bell Hotel in Clare, you should be ashamed. That's just not how you treat people.
Casual anger aside I had quite a nice day, did a second day in the office BY CHOICE as a freelancer - I could have just worked from home but I do get distracted quite easily at the moment and also I'm just loving the Volvo so any excuse to drive it is welcome. It may be 19 years old and is a bit thirsty for fuel but I feel like a real man driving it.
Put in a few hours of freelancing then, and then a few hours working on the Team Building with Drums idea, and then confirmed 2 solo shows. Those shows took a bit longer to get over the finishing line but I like that sometimes - I like the fact the venue want to chat and know more before confirming, it just means they're probably going to make an effort in promoting it and they know what they've taken on.
With my sudden night off, I caught up with comedian chum Rob to chat business and then went and had dinner with good friends, Adam and Vanessa. Lovely evening.
Casual anger aside I had quite a nice day, did a second day in the office BY CHOICE as a freelancer - I could have just worked from home but I do get distracted quite easily at the moment and also I'm just loving the Volvo so any excuse to drive it is welcome. It may be 19 years old and is a bit thirsty for fuel but I feel like a real man driving it.
Put in a few hours of freelancing then, and then a few hours working on the Team Building with Drums idea, and then confirmed 2 solo shows. Those shows took a bit longer to get over the finishing line but I like that sometimes - I like the fact the venue want to chat and know more before confirming, it just means they're probably going to make an effort in promoting it and they know what they've taken on.
With my sudden night off, I caught up with comedian chum Rob to chat business and then went and had dinner with good friends, Adam and Vanessa. Lovely evening.
Friday, 17 March 2017
Thursday 16th March 2017
Woke up to a fringe offer for my 'other' show - the cabaret one which has now been booked in for a 10 day run at one of my favourite venues. Happy and relieved about that, just need to write the thing first. If I can get the solo show confirmed too for a full run then it's all systems go.
Had a bit of freelance work today which was nice, and also a bit of a relief.
Evening gig in Bishop's Stortford with the band felt tired at times, but the new stuff is great. Audience loved it. We'll be okay, I think.
Had a bit of freelance work today which was nice, and also a bit of a relief.
Evening gig in Bishop's Stortford with the band felt tired at times, but the new stuff is great. Audience loved it. We'll be okay, I think.
Thursday, 16 March 2017
Wednesday 15th March 2017
Long drive back, nobody in a good move and the dog, who I've grown to like over the last few years, was behaving like an absolute shit the whole way. Already the back of my lovely Volvo is suffering thanks to her exuberance.
Got home, exhausted, and then off to a rehearsal with Griff, Hannah, Alan and Edd ahead of Saturday's gig. Sound brilliant, I woke up quickly enough when I felt the joy in the room.
Tuesday 14th March 2017
Getting quite frustrated by the lack of fringe offer, by the lack of freelance work... it's not the lack of these things that's actually frustrating me, but the lack of communication.
Anyway, still in Devon, took Mum to Dawlish, Torquay, Exeter and Paignton. Didn't like any of the houses. I think we've been here before.
Got back, did more work on my new novel.
Anyway, still in Devon, took Mum to Dawlish, Torquay, Exeter and Paignton. Didn't like any of the houses. I think we've been here before.
Got back, did more work on my new novel.
Monday 13th March 2017
Drove Mum (generally in quite a good mood), sister (stroppy) and dog (on very naughty form) to Devon so that Mum can look at a house or two as she intends to move soon.
Put flowers on Dad's grave, and caught up with family.
Got back to my hotel room and did some work on my new novel, 90 Seconds, which is gradually getting there.
Put flowers on Dad's grave, and caught up with family.
Got back to my hotel room and did some work on my new novel, 90 Seconds, which is gradually getting there.
Sunday 12th March 2017
Headed home from Wales, via Birmingham where we had a photoshoot for album number 3. Which we're still recording at the moment, but our photographer of choice, Rob, is based in Coventry and suggested this location.
A good fun couple of hours, I am far from photogenic but there's apps, isn't there, that can fix my face?
Dropped the others off (I love the Volvo, not sure if I've mentioned that?) and then caught up with Kate for an ideas session. She's a really successful filmmaker but also a great actress and good friend, it was just three hours of so many ideas, all of which worked, and the frustrating realisation that we don't have time to do them all justice. Will get writing, though, and see what we can do.
Saturday 11th March 2017
We shouldn't have drank so much whisky last night.
Bit of a kip, and then drove to Wales. I considered it to be 'deepest Wales' but my Welsh Facebook friends seemed offended by that because it's just outside of Cardiff. Still, had to drive down a load of hills and there was no phone signal or WiFi so pretty deep as far as I was concerned.
Loving driving the Volvo, it may be 19 years old but it's so smooth, just so easy.
Venue was an arts centre, and we got to stay in an amazing castle. Just a quick reminder that life is good. Who else gets to stay in a haunted castle, for free, as part of their job? I had an amazing room, haunted or not haunted, and they looked after us really well - great food throughout and the soundcheck was lovely.
Gig was a cracker; we were really on it tonight. When we have a nice dressing room and a soundguy we trust these shows are just easy. Lovely show.
Bit of a kip, and then drove to Wales. I considered it to be 'deepest Wales' but my Welsh Facebook friends seemed offended by that because it's just outside of Cardiff. Still, had to drive down a load of hills and there was no phone signal or WiFi so pretty deep as far as I was concerned.
Loving driving the Volvo, it may be 19 years old but it's so smooth, just so easy.
Venue was an arts centre, and we got to stay in an amazing castle. Just a quick reminder that life is good. Who else gets to stay in a haunted castle, for free, as part of their job? I had an amazing room, haunted or not haunted, and they looked after us really well - great food throughout and the soundcheck was lovely.
Gig was a cracker; we were really on it tonight. When we have a nice dressing room and a soundguy we trust these shows are just easy. Lovely show.
Friday 10th March 2017
Worrying lack of freelance work at the moment, this is why I need to push my 'Team Building with Drums' project. Spent a bit of the day tailoring that, and writing the tour book from the recent box show. It's even more frank than the documentary...those lucky people who chipped in to the Crowdfunding page will be in for a bit of a treat. If you consider a treat to be sheer brutal honesty about why an act doesn't work in Yorkshire.
Evening had a house show around Andy's... first half all old stuff, second half all new. Second half was better, I thought. The whole thing went down a storm, but let's be honest - they were a very easy crowd.
Evening had a house show around Andy's... first half all old stuff, second half all new. Second half was better, I thought. The whole thing went down a storm, but let's be honest - they were a very easy crowd.
Friday, 10 March 2017
Thursday 9th March 2017
Washed clothes again, all good now. Basically, don't use the '15 minute' setting as, although it technically cleans your clothes quicker, they just never dry.
Anyway, tour documentary finished - spent nearly 20 hours over the last couple of days piecing this all together. Looks great, although I'm slightly worried about my Long Preston rant...I was clearly distressed at the time, but I was quite brutal about the place. Maybe need to cut that.
Discussed a sitcom with a brilliant actress friend and we're meeting on Sunday night to talk through it, did some work on the murder mystery script and cleaned my bathroom. Pretty productive day really.
Evening met up with our musical director, Marcel, and Claudia and Edd to go over the content for the murder mystery show. It's really great stuff that's happening with this; if I can get the script right I think this could head to the West End and beyond. Feels like a big opportunity.
Anyway, tour documentary finished - spent nearly 20 hours over the last couple of days piecing this all together. Looks great, although I'm slightly worried about my Long Preston rant...I was clearly distressed at the time, but I was quite brutal about the place. Maybe need to cut that.
Discussed a sitcom with a brilliant actress friend and we're meeting on Sunday night to talk through it, did some work on the murder mystery script and cleaned my bathroom. Pretty productive day really.
Evening met up with our musical director, Marcel, and Claudia and Edd to go over the content for the murder mystery show. It's really great stuff that's happening with this; if I can get the script right I think this could head to the West End and beyond. Feels like a big opportunity.
Wednesday 8th March 2017
With the freelance stuff still a bit quiet I spent today focusing on two things: getting the tour documentary made, and trying to understand the new machine in the house.
Neither of which were particularly successful but took up a lot of time. For the documentary I have about 3 hours worth of footage to wade through, most of it me on a train looking anxious, as well as three full shows that I can start fiddling with. The new washing machine just confuses me and now all of my clothes smell of wet towel. HEY LADIES. I'll wash them again tomorrow.
Evening went down to a lovely little bash at a studio in Cambridge, where I caught up with old muso friends I haven't seen for years, networked with new people and generally had a cracking evening.
Neither of which were particularly successful but took up a lot of time. For the documentary I have about 3 hours worth of footage to wade through, most of it me on a train looking anxious, as well as three full shows that I can start fiddling with. The new washing machine just confuses me and now all of my clothes smell of wet towel. HEY LADIES. I'll wash them again tomorrow.
Evening went down to a lovely little bash at a studio in Cambridge, where I caught up with old muso friends I haven't seen for years, networked with new people and generally had a cracking evening.
Wednesday, 8 March 2017
Tuesday 7th March 2017
I've been back for two days and I'm feeling frustrated already. Waiting for the freelance work to come in (but the boss there is very ill so I understand the situation - should have something more this week), waiting for fringe venue offer - have spent a bit of time just pressing refresh on my email folders just in case. Other stuff has come through... a few gig offers (comedy) and a couple days session work in the studio as a drummer. And most importantly my car CD player has arrived, and (thanks to awesome techy housemate) is now working. Driving in silence was killing me.
The morning and evening were spent putting together the tour documentary and thinking heavily about how much of it I should cut (the whole Long Preston rant it maybe too strong, even for the internet), maybe do an uncut version for friends or something? There's so much footage, it'll probably takes a few days to render all the videos etc.
Took mum shopping and worked on my new novel whilst waiting for her, sat in Waitrose car park for ages etc.
Back to normal then; I need to be back on the road sharpish.
The morning and evening were spent putting together the tour documentary and thinking heavily about how much of it I should cut (the whole Long Preston rant it maybe too strong, even for the internet), maybe do an uncut version for friends or something? There's so much footage, it'll probably takes a few days to render all the videos etc.
Took mum shopping and worked on my new novel whilst waiting for her, sat in Waitrose car park for ages etc.
Back to normal then; I need to be back on the road sharpish.
Monday, 6 March 2017
Monday 6th March 2017
So tired! But just wanted to drive my new (very old) Volvo, so drove to the office to freelance. They don't have any work for me at the moment (slightly worrying), so forced into having some time out.
Did my weekly food shop, did all of my washing, looked back on the notes I'd been making on the tour...not only was I touring and documenting everything religiously, I also used my much free time sat in bus stations and in hotel rooms to work on my second novel, and also started writing a sketch show called The Bastard Pigeons.
More on that soon, hopefully. Today though I mostly replied to two weeks' worth of gig emails, panicked a bit at various double bookings and failed miserably at getting an early night.
Did my weekly food shop, did all of my washing, looked back on the notes I'd been making on the tour...not only was I touring and documenting everything religiously, I also used my much free time sat in bus stations and in hotel rooms to work on my second novel, and also started writing a sketch show called The Bastard Pigeons.
More on that soon, hopefully. Today though I mostly replied to two weeks' worth of gig emails, panicked a bit at various double bookings and failed miserably at getting an early night.
Sunday 5th March 2017
Had about an hours sleep, but the ferry back only took 14 hours in the end, arriving earlier at port than expected.
6.30am in Aberdeen...nowhere open, not even the station. Eventually found a Costa and freaked out the staff by making my breakfast last 2 and a bit hours.
Train from Aberdeen to Peterborough took forever (just under seven hours), in which I was grumpy but couldn't sleep because the train was full of children who I disliked.
Short wait, and then train from Peterborough to Cambridge, where my awesome landlord, and very close friend, Edd, came to pick me up like the legend that he is.
15 days on the road, haven't had a chance to count up all the stats yet but I did a lot of miles. I was also lost, a lot. I do know that as a tour it lost £445, but if I had stopped at day 5 it would have been in profit of about £600.
I'm tired, I'm weary...I think I've achieved something lovely here, though. Not just the tour itself - only about half the performances really worked, but I've written such extensive notes about each destination, and have filmed everything. There's a book, and a film, to come from this - it'll not only explore the limited public transport links this country has, but also the north/south divide, and why sometimes humour doesn't always translate too well in different towns. I've got a lot of content here. The book and film will both be out by May. Bit like the live DVD, those who chipped in to the Crowdfunding will get all of this for free (physical book and two DVDs) well ahead of release as a thank you...it's the least I can do for without them, I wouldn't have gone through all of this. I mean, sorry, without them, I wouldn't have had such an amazing adventure.
Which it has been on many levels, I think. I mean, this is a guy who is awkward around everyone, who never asks questions, and has barely caught a bus in his life. I'm knackered, but I think once I've had sleep I'll reflect on the fact that I am stronger now, thanks to this tour. I've certainly worked out how to ask for directions. I'll drive to the next lot, though.
6.30am in Aberdeen...nowhere open, not even the station. Eventually found a Costa and freaked out the staff by making my breakfast last 2 and a bit hours.
Train from Aberdeen to Peterborough took forever (just under seven hours), in which I was grumpy but couldn't sleep because the train was full of children who I disliked.
Short wait, and then train from Peterborough to Cambridge, where my awesome landlord, and very close friend, Edd, came to pick me up like the legend that he is.
15 days on the road, haven't had a chance to count up all the stats yet but I did a lot of miles. I was also lost, a lot. I do know that as a tour it lost £445, but if I had stopped at day 5 it would have been in profit of about £600.
I'm tired, I'm weary...I think I've achieved something lovely here, though. Not just the tour itself - only about half the performances really worked, but I've written such extensive notes about each destination, and have filmed everything. There's a book, and a film, to come from this - it'll not only explore the limited public transport links this country has, but also the north/south divide, and why sometimes humour doesn't always translate too well in different towns. I've got a lot of content here. The book and film will both be out by May. Bit like the live DVD, those who chipped in to the Crowdfunding will get all of this for free (physical book and two DVDs) well ahead of release as a thank you...it's the least I can do for without them, I wouldn't have gone through all of this. I mean, sorry, without them, I wouldn't have had such an amazing adventure.
Which it has been on many levels, I think. I mean, this is a guy who is awkward around everyone, who never asks questions, and has barely caught a bus in his life. I'm knackered, but I think once I've had sleep I'll reflect on the fact that I am stronger now, thanks to this tour. I've certainly worked out how to ask for directions. I'll drive to the next lot, though.
Saturday 4th March 2017
Lovely big breakfast in the hotel.
Had 4 hours to kill in Shetland so had a wonder around...just walked, miles, and miles, up and down with nowhere to go. Just looking, and watching, and taking photos. Perfection. It's what I needed.
Sean and Elaine then came to pick me up (Aislinn was working), and they gave me a quick tour around Lerwick, which I enjoyed, before dropping me off at the port. They are great people, I am lucky to know them.
Had a warning email, and then a slip of paper, about the stormy conditions. Was dreading the 17 hour ferry home and had every right to - it was as bumpy, as topsy turvy as I'd feared. How I wasn't sick I don't know, but I was very close at times. Kept it all in, though. Uuugghh. Horrible.
Had 4 hours to kill in Shetland so had a wonder around...just walked, miles, and miles, up and down with nowhere to go. Just looking, and watching, and taking photos. Perfection. It's what I needed.
Sean and Elaine then came to pick me up (Aislinn was working), and they gave me a quick tour around Lerwick, which I enjoyed, before dropping me off at the port. They are great people, I am lucky to know them.
Had a warning email, and then a slip of paper, about the stormy conditions. Was dreading the 17 hour ferry home and had every right to - it was as bumpy, as topsy turvy as I'd feared. How I wasn't sick I don't know, but I was very close at times. Kept it all in, though. Uuugghh. Horrible.
Friday 3rd March 2017
Was greeted at the port by friends, Sean, Elaine and their daughter, Aislinn. I'd heard a few days back that they'd recently moved to Shetlands when one of their other daughters, Siobhan, got in touch saying they were there, were excited about my show and had offered to be my tour guides for my stay on the island.
I wrote a play many, many years back that Aislinn, Siobhan and their other sister, Ceara, was in - it went to the Brighton and Edinburgh fringes and did quite well. Hadn't seen them for years, though, despite always being close to their parents, too, who enjoyed my writing a lot. Siobhan and Ceara have since got married/engaged and moved on, but Sean, Elaine and middle daughter Aislinn decided to relocate to the Shetlands for a better quality of life.
They were a joy to hang out with over this day; after all - they hadn't seen me for years and I was weary, exhausted after a long trip, knocking back the energy drinks and just looking grubby. I went to theirs for a walk around their private beach, saw some seals, did some bird watching and then they cooked me a lovely lunch before dropping me off at my hotel.
Shetland Islands is an incredible place, so beautiful, so stunning and, despite what you may believe, plenty of work. It's just a hidden secret. Hidden, 14 hours on a ferry away.
Hotel was lovely, felt very welcome. My venue for the final show of the tour was another hotel, which itself was also lovely. I walked in to a flurry of apologies from the venue manager, a nice man called Neil, who had clearly been trying to promote the show but wasn't getting much interest. I'd seen the posters everywhere, I appreciate his efforts.
The tour ended with a modest audience of 4, but a lovely 4. Sean, Elaine, Aislinn and a random old guy called Jimmy who kept buying me beer and told me afterwards it was, "the funniest show I've ever seen," but he was hammered. Good show, though, I thought.
Helen had said to me during our picnic that she had felt uncomfortable watching me do stand up, because this show is too dark in places, too raw, as much as everyone else at the Edinburgh performance didn't see that. Maybe it's because she knows me?
Either way, I tweaked the tone for the final performance, made it less about the loser guy who is still unsure about life decisions, and made it more about the guy who has just done a long tour by public transport with a box on his back, is starting to feel like the industry are noticing him and that his career is going in the right direction, is feeling like a success but is still unsure about life decisions.
This sat well, and it was by far the best performance of the run. Filmed it, those who chipped in to the Crowdfunder will get a free DVD of it.
I wrote a play many, many years back that Aislinn, Siobhan and their other sister, Ceara, was in - it went to the Brighton and Edinburgh fringes and did quite well. Hadn't seen them for years, though, despite always being close to their parents, too, who enjoyed my writing a lot. Siobhan and Ceara have since got married/engaged and moved on, but Sean, Elaine and middle daughter Aislinn decided to relocate to the Shetlands for a better quality of life.
They were a joy to hang out with over this day; after all - they hadn't seen me for years and I was weary, exhausted after a long trip, knocking back the energy drinks and just looking grubby. I went to theirs for a walk around their private beach, saw some seals, did some bird watching and then they cooked me a lovely lunch before dropping me off at my hotel.
Shetland Islands is an incredible place, so beautiful, so stunning and, despite what you may believe, plenty of work. It's just a hidden secret. Hidden, 14 hours on a ferry away.
Hotel was lovely, felt very welcome. My venue for the final show of the tour was another hotel, which itself was also lovely. I walked in to a flurry of apologies from the venue manager, a nice man called Neil, who had clearly been trying to promote the show but wasn't getting much interest. I'd seen the posters everywhere, I appreciate his efforts.
The tour ended with a modest audience of 4, but a lovely 4. Sean, Elaine, Aislinn and a random old guy called Jimmy who kept buying me beer and told me afterwards it was, "the funniest show I've ever seen," but he was hammered. Good show, though, I thought.
Helen had said to me during our picnic that she had felt uncomfortable watching me do stand up, because this show is too dark in places, too raw, as much as everyone else at the Edinburgh performance didn't see that. Maybe it's because she knows me?
Either way, I tweaked the tone for the final performance, made it less about the loser guy who is still unsure about life decisions, and made it more about the guy who has just done a long tour by public transport with a box on his back, is starting to feel like the industry are noticing him and that his career is going in the right direction, is feeling like a success but is still unsure about life decisions.
This sat well, and it was by far the best performance of the run. Filmed it, those who chipped in to the Crowdfunder will get a free DVD of it.
Thursday 2nd March 2017
No sleep - it's impossible to sleep in a bed that size. My legs were actually in the air when I woke up.
Train to Aberdeen and then walked over to my venue for an afternoon show. How was this ever going to work? 3pm performance, in a busy, big cafe full of people on laptops, having conversations and...just not expecting a comedian? The venue were expecting me, but hadn't really told anyone about it.
I'd agreed to do a one-act version of the show today, 50 minutes or so, so basically a best of. Started, was mostly ignored, won a few over thanks to hastily throwing in a game of 'name that tune on a box' and the Grace/Tracey song combo helped, but it was mostly a struggle. Got through it, it could have been a lot worse.
Ran through the streets of Aberdeen, which is a really grubby place with just *so much* vomit, everywhere in the streets.
Made my ferry, 14 hour overnight trip to the Shetlands. Wasn't sick, many were.
Train to Aberdeen and then walked over to my venue for an afternoon show. How was this ever going to work? 3pm performance, in a busy, big cafe full of people on laptops, having conversations and...just not expecting a comedian? The venue were expecting me, but hadn't really told anyone about it.
I'd agreed to do a one-act version of the show today, 50 minutes or so, so basically a best of. Started, was mostly ignored, won a few over thanks to hastily throwing in a game of 'name that tune on a box' and the Grace/Tracey song combo helped, but it was mostly a struggle. Got through it, it could have been a lot worse.
Ran through the streets of Aberdeen, which is a really grubby place with just *so much* vomit, everywhere in the streets.
Made my ferry, 14 hour overnight trip to the Shetlands. Wasn't sick, many were.
Wednesday 1st March 2017
Day off in Edinburgh. Met up with Helen for a picnic and proper 4 hour catch-up. She always has been, and always will be, one of my favourite people - we've known each other for eleven years and I've even written two plays about her (I think she knows this). 4 hours of joy, basically. Keen not leave it so long next time - have already agreed to stay at her new farm on the Scottish borders for a week after the fringe to, in her words, "eat veg and drink smoothies."
Then met up with my good buddy Adam, who is based in the city but couldn't make the show last night, for a couple beers and a spot of dinner.
Edinburgh is great, still haven't had my fringe offer yet (as much as quite a few of my comedy friends have...alarm bells starting to ring) but hope to be back here for the full three weeks in August.
Then met up with my good buddy Adam, who is based in the city but couldn't make the show last night, for a couple beers and a spot of dinner.
Edinburgh is great, still haven't had my fringe offer yet (as much as quite a few of my comedy friends have...alarm bells starting to ring) but hope to be back here for the full three weeks in August.
Tuesday 28th February 2017
Missed the only bus out of the village (seriously? One a day? At 8am? Come on) so got a taxi back to Consett. Bus to Newcastle, got off at the wrong stop, walked eventually to the station. Comfy train to Edinburgh, watching old episodes of Dad's Army on my phone.
Checked in to the pokiest of hotels, my home for the next two nights. Tomorrow's show in Dundee had long been cancelled (as they thought I was a folk singer, I'm glad they realised I wasn't before the show itself) so I figured I should just spend two nights in my favourite city.
Venue annoyed me tonight - they're on half the door but didn't even mention it in any social media or put the posters up. And then get grumpy when only 6 people turn up. What did they expect?
I knew 3 of those 6; Helen (who I haven't seen for years, and years), Nicky and Phillippa.
Show wasn't bad, even though in a proper venue with a proper stage and lights, it felt intimate - due to the lack of audience, and was a relaxed performance. Not bad.
Checked in to the pokiest of hotels, my home for the next two nights. Tomorrow's show in Dundee had long been cancelled (as they thought I was a folk singer, I'm glad they realised I wasn't before the show itself) so I figured I should just spend two nights in my favourite city.
Venue annoyed me tonight - they're on half the door but didn't even mention it in any social media or put the posters up. And then get grumpy when only 6 people turn up. What did they expect?
I knew 3 of those 6; Helen (who I haven't seen for years, and years), Nicky and Phillippa.
Show wasn't bad, even though in a proper venue with a proper stage and lights, it felt intimate - due to the lack of audience, and was a relaxed performance. Not bad.
Monday 27th February 2017
Up early, walked through lovely Harrogate and over to the train station. Train to Leeds, then long train to Newcastle. Train to Riding Mill, bus from Riding Mill to the Metrocentre Interchange. Bus to Consett Bus Station, and then taxi to Blanchland.
Very welcoming venue and complimentary accommodation was nothing short of stunning. Had a chat to a couple of the locals and felt great ahead of the show but the show itself (sold out) just didn't really work tonight. Mostly because of four old ladies on a table at the front who were just never going to like it. The rest of the room were into but they spoilt it for everyone and I focused on them, to try and win them over - which was never going to work and the whole show felt tense.
On paper perhaps a good show, but I honestly felt like I was struggling tonight.
Very welcoming venue and complimentary accommodation was nothing short of stunning. Had a chat to a couple of the locals and felt great ahead of the show but the show itself (sold out) just didn't really work tonight. Mostly because of four old ladies on a table at the front who were just never going to like it. The rest of the room were into but they spoilt it for everyone and I focused on them, to try and win them over - which was never going to work and the whole show felt tense.
On paper perhaps a good show, but I honestly felt like I was struggling tonight.
Sunday 26th February 2017
Despite 'clubbing' last night, managed to wake up in time for breakfast. Walked through Skipton, it's lovely - see, the north is nice, just not the bit I did a show in.
Train to Leeds, and then a friendly enough replacement bus over to Harrogate.
Loved Harrogate instantly, so posh, everyone holds themselves so well. A random stranger showed me to my hotel, which was kind. Hotel was nice, after last night's struggles it was what I needed - had a nice long bath, chilled out for a bit.
Show was at a cricket club, felt like a million miles away from last night's show.
Nice show tonight, small Sunday night audience - barely double figures, but they all laughed at the right times. Filmed it, might do something with it.
Venue manager very kindly gave me a lift back to my hotel (I didn't mind the walk there to be honest). Such a nice hotel, don't know if I mentioned that?
Train to Leeds, and then a friendly enough replacement bus over to Harrogate.
Loved Harrogate instantly, so posh, everyone holds themselves so well. A random stranger showed me to my hotel, which was kind. Hotel was nice, after last night's struggles it was what I needed - had a nice long bath, chilled out for a bit.
Show was at a cricket club, felt like a million miles away from last night's show.
Nice show tonight, small Sunday night audience - barely double figures, but they all laughed at the right times. Filmed it, might do something with it.
Venue manager very kindly gave me a lift back to my hotel (I didn't mind the walk there to be honest). Such a nice hotel, don't know if I mentioned that?
Saturday 25th February 2016
Mistimed my trip and ended up waiting 2 hours in Faversham station. Eventually got a train back to Victoria Station to Kings Cross, ran like an idiot (with a box on his back) and made my train to Leeds with 4 minutes to spare.
Train full of screaming kids.
Leeds to my very northern venue - I didn't even know this place even existed. Found the whole trip quite...aggressive. I heard someone say, aimed at me, "I would sit down but there's fucking tourists everywhere."
Welcome to the north. That wasn't half as bad as the show itself, though. I was staying at the venue, but didn't actually do that. Show started, I lost them within minutes...you could just feel the mood drop in the room. At one point (mid-song), a woman stood and declared, "right, I'm going for a fag." Other moments in the show included four men putting napkins on their heads and finding that the most amusing thing ever and various people walking out.
I cut it at 40 minutes. It's a miracle I lasted that long without being bottled. It felt dangerous.
Realised I couldn't stay there - called the next village, got a hotel room, gave my keys back. The landlord told me they didn't like my show because I was "too wordy." This made me angry. One of them had said earlier in the evening that the last comedian they saw was Bernard Manning. I didn't stand a chance.
But equally I didn't stand a chance of getting out of this village. 4 taxi firms locally, all booked up for the WEEK. Couldn't get an Uber, but that was a bit ambitious. Pissing down with rain. Realised there was a train at 11.20, ran through the streets, the deserted streets, got lost a lot, pitch black, no lights anywhere, eventually found station. Waited and waited. Train was 11.20 in the morning. Literally crumbled to the ground. The very wet ground. Tried all four cab firms again, no luck.
Decided to walk it. 10 miles, in pitch black, down country lanes. By the time a third car nearly knocked me over I realised it wasn't such a great idea. Ran back to the station, where at least there was one light. Called my new hotel, begged them for help - I was totally stranded. They gave me the number for a cab firm at their end, who would come out and get me but at double fee. I accepted.
An hour later the cab turned up, I told the driver, a lovely man called Chris, the whole story of the evening. I like Chris, we'll keep in touch, especially as he's a big part of my documentary.
Arrived in Skipton eventually. Luckily, my hotel room was above a nightclub. Normally I'd hate this, but tonight, before I'd even checked in, me and my box drum went clubbing. I was about 15 years older than most people there, but it was the most fun I'd had all night. By clubbing I mean I sat in a corner, drinking.
Train full of screaming kids.
Leeds to my very northern venue - I didn't even know this place even existed. Found the whole trip quite...aggressive. I heard someone say, aimed at me, "I would sit down but there's fucking tourists everywhere."
Welcome to the north. That wasn't half as bad as the show itself, though. I was staying at the venue, but didn't actually do that. Show started, I lost them within minutes...you could just feel the mood drop in the room. At one point (mid-song), a woman stood and declared, "right, I'm going for a fag." Other moments in the show included four men putting napkins on their heads and finding that the most amusing thing ever and various people walking out.
I cut it at 40 minutes. It's a miracle I lasted that long without being bottled. It felt dangerous.
Realised I couldn't stay there - called the next village, got a hotel room, gave my keys back. The landlord told me they didn't like my show because I was "too wordy." This made me angry. One of them had said earlier in the evening that the last comedian they saw was Bernard Manning. I didn't stand a chance.
But equally I didn't stand a chance of getting out of this village. 4 taxi firms locally, all booked up for the WEEK. Couldn't get an Uber, but that was a bit ambitious. Pissing down with rain. Realised there was a train at 11.20, ran through the streets, the deserted streets, got lost a lot, pitch black, no lights anywhere, eventually found station. Waited and waited. Train was 11.20 in the morning. Literally crumbled to the ground. The very wet ground. Tried all four cab firms again, no luck.
Decided to walk it. 10 miles, in pitch black, down country lanes. By the time a third car nearly knocked me over I realised it wasn't such a great idea. Ran back to the station, where at least there was one light. Called my new hotel, begged them for help - I was totally stranded. They gave me the number for a cab firm at their end, who would come out and get me but at double fee. I accepted.
An hour later the cab turned up, I told the driver, a lovely man called Chris, the whole story of the evening. I like Chris, we'll keep in touch, especially as he's a big part of my documentary.
Arrived in Skipton eventually. Luckily, my hotel room was above a nightclub. Normally I'd hate this, but tonight, before I'd even checked in, me and my box drum went clubbing. I was about 15 years older than most people there, but it was the most fun I'd had all night. By clubbing I mean I sat in a corner, drinking.
Friday 24th February 2017
Dad would have been 66 today. Time is going a bit too quickly. I think he'd be proud of what I'm doing at the moment.
Woke up a bit grumpy in my overpriced cupboard, and declined the free breakfast as I just need to get out. Short walk to Earls Court station, and then a train to Victoria Station. Bit of a delay so called Mum to make sure she's okay, which she is - she's tough, well, she puts on a brave face. Train over to Faversham.
Accommodation is tucked behind a rowdy pub, no towels. Walked down to the venue - felt at home straight away. Sold out show, best it's looked so far - I was totally on it, they were with me, this works, that's a relief! I like Faversham a lot.
Woke up a bit grumpy in my overpriced cupboard, and declined the free breakfast as I just need to get out. Short walk to Earls Court station, and then a train to Victoria Station. Bit of a delay so called Mum to make sure she's okay, which she is - she's tough, well, she puts on a brave face. Train over to Faversham.
Accommodation is tucked behind a rowdy pub, no towels. Walked down to the venue - felt at home straight away. Sold out show, best it's looked so far - I was totally on it, they were with me, this works, that's a relief! I like Faversham a lot.
Thursday 23rd February 2017
Woke up in Hind and Chris's spare room, on a mattress on the floor, and then made my way over to my budget B+B in Earls Court ahead of tonight's public London show.
London accommodation, compared to what I got for the same price (£50 a night) elsewhere is so...scummy. Horrible, it's like student accommodation.
And then the show got cancelled because the promoter was on maternity leave and the venue didn't know about the show so hadn't done any promotion. Spent a depressing night in a depressing hotel room, watching Spurs go out of Europe. Depressing.
London accommodation, compared to what I got for the same price (£50 a night) elsewhere is so...scummy. Horrible, it's like student accommodation.
And then the show got cancelled because the promoter was on maternity leave and the venue didn't know about the show so hadn't done any promotion. Spent a depressing night in a depressing hotel room, watching Spurs go out of Europe. Depressing.
Wednesday 22nd February 2017
Another lovely hotel breakfast. This tour will make me fat, it's just all big breakfasts.
Taxi to Langport, got confused by the lack of bus stops. Missed my bus. 2 hours later got bus to Yeovil Bus Station, bit of a wait then over to Yeovil Pen Mill Station. Waited over an hour but then caught train to Cleary Mill, then over to London Paddington.
London makes me feel stressed. This was supposed to be a show in Bristol but that was pulled a few months back when the lady who booked me got sacked, so Hind offered me the chance to do this as a house show instead. Hind is great, we go back many years and it's nice to see her do so well for herself...when she was touring with me as a young actress about 6 years ago that didn't seem to be the case.
Train over to Wood Lane and then a walk to Hind and Chris's house.
I love lounge shows, they're always the best. Small lounge, small crowd, but cracking show. I was just so relaxed, it flew by. Hind pointed out that this is the first time she's seen me do stand-up, as much as the stuff she toured with me was heading that way anyway, and that I seem to have finally found my calling. That's a relief.
Taxi to Langport, got confused by the lack of bus stops. Missed my bus. 2 hours later got bus to Yeovil Bus Station, bit of a wait then over to Yeovil Pen Mill Station. Waited over an hour but then caught train to Cleary Mill, then over to London Paddington.
London makes me feel stressed. This was supposed to be a show in Bristol but that was pulled a few months back when the lady who booked me got sacked, so Hind offered me the chance to do this as a house show instead. Hind is great, we go back many years and it's nice to see her do so well for herself...when she was touring with me as a young actress about 6 years ago that didn't seem to be the case.
Train over to Wood Lane and then a walk to Hind and Chris's house.
I love lounge shows, they're always the best. Small lounge, small crowd, but cracking show. I was just so relaxed, it flew by. Hind pointed out that this is the first time she's seen me do stand-up, as much as the stuff she toured with me was heading that way anyway, and that I seem to have finally found my calling. That's a relief.
Tuesday 21st February 2017
Let's be honest; if I carry on drinking this much on tour I won't make it to the end. I'm not paying for any of it, of course, but it's not good for me. I know that. But it does make a me a rock star, yeah?
Another early breakfast (damn you, hotels), missed bus as waiting at the wrong stop, waited an hour and a half for the next one. Got a bus to a place called The Nags Head, had to then run over a dual carriageway (so dangerous, nearly dead) to get to this stop which wasn't really a stop it was basically on a farm. Waited for a long time, during which I only saw tractors. Panicked a bit.
Eventually managed to flag down a bus to Langport, where tonight's show is. Realised my B+B isn't in Langport, it's 2 miles out of town. Started walking it; no roads, just fields, got lost, angered a cow, went back to bus stop and called a cab.
Checked in at B+B which was above a friendly 'local' pub and felt very welcome. Rewrote the middle part of the first half of the show, took out the football metaphors which weren't really working, shame. Put in some old 'safe' bits. Got a cab back to the venue, realised I was at the wrong venue but walked to the right place.
Another sold out show, this one in a much bigger room. Was sharper than last night - better layout, crowd seemed up for it. The whole thing just felt very 'nice' - I need this to be cutting. Not bad, though. Venue owner gave me a lift back to my B+B, where the locals had got wind of the fact that there was a comedian staying...more free beer ensued, and great conversations. It was a late one.
Another early breakfast (damn you, hotels), missed bus as waiting at the wrong stop, waited an hour and a half for the next one. Got a bus to a place called The Nags Head, had to then run over a dual carriageway (so dangerous, nearly dead) to get to this stop which wasn't really a stop it was basically on a farm. Waited for a long time, during which I only saw tractors. Panicked a bit.
Eventually managed to flag down a bus to Langport, where tonight's show is. Realised my B+B isn't in Langport, it's 2 miles out of town. Started walking it; no roads, just fields, got lost, angered a cow, went back to bus stop and called a cab.
Checked in at B+B which was above a friendly 'local' pub and felt very welcome. Rewrote the middle part of the first half of the show, took out the football metaphors which weren't really working, shame. Put in some old 'safe' bits. Got a cab back to the venue, realised I was at the wrong venue but walked to the right place.
Another sold out show, this one in a much bigger room. Was sharper than last night - better layout, crowd seemed up for it. The whole thing just felt very 'nice' - I need this to be cutting. Not bad, though. Venue owner gave me a lift back to my B+B, where the locals had got wind of the fact that there was a comedian staying...more free beer ensued, and great conversations. It was a late one.
Monday 20th February 2017
It's almost worrying if the first date of a long tour goes so well...unless of course, this is actually a good show? I'm not sure, I like it a lot but it feels fragile at times - it might be a marmite kinda piece.
Either way, performance number two was up in Somerset. Chard to be precise. Train from Weymouth to Yeovil Pen, bus to Yeovil Bus Station, bust to Yeovil Junction, train to Axminster, bus to Chard.
Checked in at slightly overbearingly friendly B+B, and then down to my show. Another sold out one, not quite as lively as the opening show, as feared. The layout was a struggle, the audience were old. They had a big meal beforehand so the show was continually delayed - I was there for about 2 hours before doing anything.
This show is in 2 halves, roughly about 45 minutes each, with an interval. I wanted a faster start to the second half after yesterday's dip, which I think was achieved. Ultimately, it wasn't what they were expecting but they were still a really, really lovely audience, many of whom came up to me afterwards to praise the quality of the performance. Well done, Chard. Had a few beers with two old men, Jim and Tim, afterwards, before staggering back to my accommodation.
Either way, performance number two was up in Somerset. Chard to be precise. Train from Weymouth to Yeovil Pen, bus to Yeovil Bus Station, bust to Yeovil Junction, train to Axminster, bus to Chard.
Checked in at slightly overbearingly friendly B+B, and then down to my show. Another sold out one, not quite as lively as the opening show, as feared. The layout was a struggle, the audience were old. They had a big meal beforehand so the show was continually delayed - I was there for about 2 hours before doing anything.
This show is in 2 halves, roughly about 45 minutes each, with an interval. I wanted a faster start to the second half after yesterday's dip, which I think was achieved. Ultimately, it wasn't what they were expecting but they were still a really, really lovely audience, many of whom came up to me afterwards to praise the quality of the performance. Well done, Chard. Had a few beers with two old men, Jim and Tim, afterwards, before staggering back to my accommodation.
Sunday 19th February 2017
The thing about hotels, as I'm sure I'm about to experience a lot over the next fortnight, is that you have to get up early - it seemed to be frowned upon if you wake up at 10am for example. Anyway, had an early breakfast and then decided to walk from Weymouth to Portland - it's only about 6 miles away.
And with this, the adventure truly began. Just one man, and a box...I didn't have to walk it, but it's good to, isn't it? It's healthy?
And with this, came the start of my many tour cock-ups. But this wasn't entirely my fault....I didn't know there was a rivalry between Weymouth and Portland to the extent that they give you the wrong directions on purpose so you don't cross over. Eventually, thanks to a very helpful homeless man and 4G kicking in on my phone, I was heading in the right direction, after 2 miles of walking the wrong way.
8 miles later I'd found my venue. Mostly uphill, it has to be said. Venue very welcoming to this very sweaty man with a box on his back.
The show itself - which was totally sold out, was an absolute cracker. First half I couldn't do a thing wrong, second half had a slow start but soon hit form again. Brilliant start to a long tour, with many locals offering to buy me beer after (I accepted).
After all that, a kind audience member gave me a lift back to Weymouth, where I celebrated with a KFC and Match of the Day in my hotel room. Actually. Living. The. Dream.
And with this, the adventure truly began. Just one man, and a box...I didn't have to walk it, but it's good to, isn't it? It's healthy?
And with this, came the start of my many tour cock-ups. But this wasn't entirely my fault....I didn't know there was a rivalry between Weymouth and Portland to the extent that they give you the wrong directions on purpose so you don't cross over. Eventually, thanks to a very helpful homeless man and 4G kicking in on my phone, I was heading in the right direction, after 2 miles of walking the wrong way.
8 miles later I'd found my venue. Mostly uphill, it has to be said. Venue very welcoming to this very sweaty man with a box on his back.
The show itself - which was totally sold out, was an absolute cracker. First half I couldn't do a thing wrong, second half had a slow start but soon hit form again. Brilliant start to a long tour, with many locals offering to buy me beer after (I accepted).
After all that, a kind audience member gave me a lift back to Weymouth, where I celebrated with a KFC and Match of the Day in my hotel room. Actually. Living. The. Dream.
Saturday 18th February 2017
With the band show cancelled due to poor ticket sales that gave me a little extra time to pack, and head down south a little earlier.
Housemate very kindly gave me a lift to the station, and then I caught a train over to Kings Cross, got lost on the underground for a bit and then eventually (via the wrong carriage) to Weymouth. Walked to hotel, which was very nice, and slept...a long day, mostly fuelled by anxiety for the tour which starts, er, tomorrow.
Housemate very kindly gave me a lift to the station, and then I caught a train over to Kings Cross, got lost on the underground for a bit and then eventually (via the wrong carriage) to Weymouth. Walked to hotel, which was very nice, and slept...a long day, mostly fuelled by anxiety for the tour which starts, er, tomorrow.
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