Thursday 12th February 2015

Probably sounded dramatic, all that stuff I said about last night, but it really did hit me bad. Maybe it's been building for a while; it's a tough commitment quitting the job and when the shows don't go to plan (opening night - argument with audience member, second night - 3 audience members in big London venue, third night - a no complete no show despite excessive PR) it's natural to get narky, especially when I care about this show so much.

Anyway, in short I opened up a bit too much on Facebook, and I feel a bit daft about that. I get a lot of love, you know, people want me to succeed. I have a lot of friends, I'm very grateful. 

I wanted to quit, I turned down some show offers today. I'm not a quitter though; that's not some macho statement, it's just that I can't stop myself. Maybe the live stuff doesn't work out sometimes, this certainly isn't making me a living at the moment, but after I'd moped around I bit I spent the rest of the day working on a new show that I should be performing soon with Jo, who is a very talented pianist/actress type (we're meeting on Monday to go through it, but she's already agreed to it). See, I just can't stop myself.

Evening played a little covers gig with Griff and Vix; easy money, easy audience. I'm not into covers but there was something satisfying about a happy audience, and hitting that percussion hard, quite therapeutic. And it's always a joy to be on stage with two of my best mates, no matter what the format is.